Monday, March 23, 2009
What Was That You Were Saying About Oracle’s Worst Quarter in 15 Years?
Well, JMP Securities analyst Patrick Walravens’s assessment of Oracle’s business these past few months was about as wrong as wrong can be, wasn’t it? In early March, Walravens predicted the company’s February quarter would be an abysmal one. Two weeks later, Oracle posts better-than-expected results for that quarter and announces a dividend–its first ever.
Monday, September 22, 2008
Unlike Fed, Microsoft and HP Have No Debt and Billions in Cash
Looks like this period of “rapid and profound change” on Wall Street hasn’t much fazed Microsoft and Hewlett-Packard. This morning Microsoft’s board authorized a new five-year $40 billion share buyback plan and an 18 percent dividend boost. Meanwhile, HP said its board had approved the repurchase of $8 billion in company stock.
New From Time Warner Cable: Dividend-on-Demand
Time Warner, the world’s largest media company, soon won’t be quite so large. This morning Time Warner revealed the details of its planned spinoff of Time Warner Cable, a massive transaction that will separate the company’s content and distribution businesses once and for all.
Comcast Throttles BitTorrent Traffic, Founder’s Salary
Well, Comcast founder Ralph Roberts has at least one thing in common with Apple CEO Steve Jobs: an annual salary of $1. Bowing to shareholder criticism, the bandwidth-throttling cable company is slashing Roberts’s pay from $1.85 million to a buck and has amended his compensation package so that he will no longer be eligible for [...]
Friday, August 31, 2007
Microsoft Legal Breaks Into Song: ‘Another One Bites the Dust’
It’s taken the better part of a decade, but Microsoft has finally managed to settle the patent-violation case brought against it by Eolas Technologies. First filed in 1999, the lawsuit claimed Microsoft’s Internet Explorer wrongfully used Eolas’s technology for running external applications in the browser. Eolas won $520.6 million in damages from Microsoft in 2003, [...]
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About John
John Paczkowski has been poking fun at the tech industry and the personalities that drive it since 1997. From 1999 to 2007, he wrote the award-winning tech news Web log Good Morning Silicon Valley for the San Jose Mercury News, Silicon Valley's daily newspaper. Read more »
Ethics Statement
Here is a statement of my ethics and coverage policies. It is more than most of you want to know, but, in the age of suspicion of the media, I am laying it all out.
alt.misc
- Godzilla’s Food, Exercise, and Dream Diary
12:58 AM: Breakfast: Two schools of fish from Tokyo Bay. Calories: 782,000. How I was feeling when I ate this: confused, irradiated, hating my size.
11:37 AM: Exercise: “Taxi Stomp” (alternating legs, for 30 blocks). Calories burned: 148,900,183. - Scenes From An Alternate Universe Where The Beatles Accepted Lorne Michaels’ Generous Offer
1983. The Beatles announce their first tour in thirteen years, but likewise announce that Michael Jackson will be going on tour with them as a one gigantic mega-concert event.
- The Golden Age of Video
Best video mashup ever.
- I’m not dead yet
A Facebook Memorial
- Pulp Fiction Audio Mix
Wow.
- A world without the Internet
Worth it for the Rickrolling photo alone.
- Google Wave Cinema: Pulp Fiction
Excellent.
- Dead Fly Art
Flughumor!
- Happy Birthday Monty Python …
… you vacuous, toffee-nosed, malodorous perverts
- ‘You are being shagged by a rare parrot’
Stephen Fry and zoologist Mark Carwardine meet the kakapo — a fat, flightless and very randy rare parrot.
