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Thursday, May 15, 2008

Good Advice From a Grand Theft Auto Dating FAQ

Fill the fun bar all the way to the top and keep it there for a few seconds to have a successful date.

10 Optical Illusions …

… in 2 Minutes

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Word Problems For Future Hedge Fund Managers

3. Among those earning 10-figure incomes, Mr. Soros’s total annual compensation is greater than Mr. Falcone’s. Mr. Falcone’s is greater than Mr. Griffin’s. Mr. Griffin’s is smaller than Mr. Soros’s, and Mr. Paulson’s is greater than Mr. Soros’s. In descending order, list the men by the respective hotness of their trophy wives.

A Letter to Prince Regarding the Crying of Doves and the Fiasco That Resulted From the Presentation of a Speech on That Topic

Dear Mr. Prince: It’s been three days since you delivered your keynote address, “When Doves Cry,” to our organization, the American Ornithological Society.

Monday, May 5, 2008

Go Ahead and Look at the Menu–It’s in English …

I’ll have the “J&J fresh intestine pot,” a side of “cowboy leg” and the “carbon burns black bowel” to go, please.

Sunday, May 4, 2008

Waiters Nauseated by Food

Starring Stephen Colbert and Steve Carell

Friday, May 2, 2008

Homer Simpson …

… in CSS

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

ThinkPad Air

Lenovo has its way with Apple’s MacBook Air ads

Monday, April 28, 2008

The Catcher in the Retirement Home

If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you’ll probably want to know is where my cemetery plot is, and what my lousy adulthood was like …

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Royal Pingdom’s List of Funny Google Domain Names

googletimewarner.com? googlepoo.com?

Monday, April 21, 2008

Good Lord! How Old Is Apple’s Ergonomics Page?

Apparently, it predates the Internet.

“‘Charlie Rose’ by Samuel Beckett”

Google …No. … Google. No. … Google …No.

William Shakespeare’s Pulp Fiction

Pulp Fiction, as performed by the King’s Men

Thursday, April 17, 2008

The Most Hated Song in the World

Accordion, bagpipe, a rapping operatic soprano AND a grating children’s chorus …

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Bomb Disposal

A Primer

About John

John Paczkowski has been poking fun at the tech industry and the personalities that drive it since 1997. From 1999 to 2007, he wrote the award-winning tech news Web log Good Morning Silicon Valley for the San Jose Mercury News, Silicon Valley's daily newspaper.

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Ethics Statement

Here is a statement of my ethics and coverage policies. It is more than most of you want to know, but, in the age of suspicion of the media, I am laying it all out.

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