John Paczkowski

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Verizon Droid: Don’t Be a Sissy

December 4, 2009 at 7:00 am PT

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vzThe male ego is a fragile thing. The last thing you want is a phone that challenges it with an effeminate form factor and pantywaist performance specs. As a guy, you want a phone that doesn’t emasculate you every time you whip it out. Otherwise, you might become insecure and resentful.

Evidently, that’s the conceit of Verizon’s (VZ) latest ad for the Motorola (MOT) Droid, which touts it as a HE-MAN super-smartphone over Apple’s (AAPL) prissy iPhone.

“Should a phone be pretty,” Verizon’s ad asks. “Should it be a tiara-wearing digitally-clueless beauty pageant queen? Or should it be fast? Racehorse-duct-taped-to-a-Scud-missile fast? We say the latter. So we built the phone that does. Does rip through the Web like a circular saw through a ripe banana. Is it a precious porcelain figurine of a phone? No. It’s not a princess. It’s a robot. A phone that trades hair-do for can-do.”

Droid. It’s a phone, an Internet device and a male-enhancement solution in one. Congratulations, Verizon; this ad is going to kill with the “men 18 and older” demographic.

Tagged with: ad, advertising, Apple, demographic, digital, Droid, form factor, Google, hardware, Internet, iPhone, John Paczkowski, Motorola, performance specs, phone, smartphone, telecom, Verizon, Web

comments so far. Add yours.

  • Anonymous

    Hey Verizon:

    I just spent eight years waiting for a versatile, computer cell phone with hardware and software that finally is intuitive and just works. My head can’t be turned by yet another me-too product re-imagined by old graduates of the school for hard knocks. If you think Verizon and Motorola simply can superficially replace those beefy, square-jawed, GI Joe handsets of yesterday with some robotic themed object that tries to mimic the iPhone’s functionality, think again. You old school guys had numerous chances to design cell phones for consumers instead of pieces of crap for your own business models. You blew it, and now you want us to help you help you test-develop a half-finished phone rushed to market with clever marketing that’s little more than a mediocre copy of a genuine, Apple original? This is the 21st Century. The future of technology is about hardware AND software integration and not just hardware you luddites. Unfortunately for you, nobody, not even Google, does software better than Apple Inc. Beauty is more than skin deep, and the iPhone proves this. Otherwise, why you be in such a rush to copy all things Apple? Thanks, but no thanks.

  • novatom

    Actually the really feminine phone is Sprint's new Pixi. No red blooded straight American male would be caught dead with a Pixi!

  • Fred Hamranhansenhansen

    Perfect bookend to the Pre, which Palm told us was for girls.

    Nothing that Verizon has said about the iPhone has been accurate, so the fact that they have gone from misrepresentation to name calling is not really surprising.

  • samharrison

    drioid's another floater just like orkut…google trying to be apple… news flash: google hey day is over

  • carolannie

    This ad is just weird. It is a turnoff for me, and I would suppose that Droid wouldn't want to turn off old women? Maybe they do want to drive us into the IPhone's arms?

  • droidum

    Awesome commercial. For all the iPhone users who don't know much about the Droid… let me tell ya… this phone is badA**!!! I use to have an iPhone and won't even consider going back… especially to AT&T's crappy network. Anywho.. if you have an iPhone, give the Droid a spin… you'll never go back.

  • odiextian

    I like so much my Motorola Droid. I just bought it at http://www.amzpricesniper.com at its best retail price now.

  • tknito

    yeah i gave your lil droid a spin and, uhhh… oh yeah after several tries like most mobile phones it would not load a “true web page”, this just makes it clear that the iPhone is superior and even with AT&T's so called “spotty” coverage it still kick's some droidA** and oh, guess what? i can surf the web while i'm making a call, can your lil droid do that?

  • droidum

    is that it? You have to be kidding me… surely there's more. The Droid is so far advanced compared to the iPhone, I'm surprised anyone is still trying to defend the iPhone. Most of you guys are saying, “wait for the next iPhone.” But you… no, you're different. Kind of like a captain on a sinking ship… It's honorable, but foolish. Ok, so let's start here… The Droid does support communication and browsing at the same time and it also works over wifi. It's simply cdma (the technology Verizon uses) that does not support it. In other words there are Droid users all over the world with that capability. Not that it's all that useful I might add.

    Now, your turn. I just got back from Kauai Hawaii and was able to watch 3 movies on the plane. I was able to change the battery, can your iPhoney do that?

    I used the (free) turn by turn navigation the entire time I was there… can your iPhoney do that?

    I receive my calls via Google Voice… which allows me to record calls, receive email messages, leave personal messages for individual callers… and a lot more… can your iPhoney do that?

    I can't remember the last time I dropped a call… no wait. I did have a friend on AT&T and the call dropped when we were talking, but aside from that, I don't recall. Can you say that?

    I can go on and on… but surely you can't think that phone you have today has a chance… join the chorus and call for the new iPhone to be better…

  • droidum

    But wait, there's more!!! I expected a reply by now, but since I didn't get it, I'll continue…

    Can your iPhone do Flash? The Droid will do Flash after the 2.1 update in February.

    Can your iPhone keep track of where your friends are? (Google Latitude).

    Can your iPhone load widgets?

    Does your iPhone have a real keyboard?

    Does your iPhone have a 5MP Camera?

    Whew… my fingers are getting tired. I'll have to save the rest for the next few posts. Anywho, you should really try the Droid. It is a much better phone and getting better with each release. Apple will not be able to keep up. This is just the beginning… wait until the Nexus II comes out. You're going to be impressed.